dasheroy_muffins

Currently having an ongoing ask-box conversation on Tumblr with one of my absolute favorite authors of the Homestuck fandom, who is giving me advice on books about trans* characters and trans* awareness for my school's LGBT organization... 

WHEN DID I DIE
IS THIS HEAVEN

 Have I misunderstood?

All I did was lean on your shoulder. We never touch, not ever. I tap your arm to get your attention, that's it. But now I leaned on you, maybe out of some misplaced jealousy or pride because He was there and He saw it all. But deep down there is also deep affection.

And now when I'm around you I don't know what to say. What was once effortless, the only easy friendship I had, seems so impossibly hard, and I don't even know what I've done. You don't seem to have changed how you act, and yet somehow...

Somehow I'm sure you hate me.

But I thought... I thought maybe you liked me. And that maybe I liked you.

I guess I don't understand either of us.



I'm getting tired of misunderstanding, of thinking people feel things they don't. I'm tired of feeling misled, and of feeling let down.

 Again with the up-all-night-doing-homework...

Dude, just saw the trailer for She's The Man. Is it just me, or is Amanda Bynes kind of attractive in drag with short hair?

...what the hell, self.

It's two in the morning and I'm still up, watching Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen with my friend Ian in his dorm room.
What the fuuuuuck I'm so tiiiiiiiired

But hey, I got proactive and sent an email to the people who represent Adam Young from Owl City begging them to let me have an interview with him for my creativity project... so there's a teeny tiny chance that I might have some form of communication with someone that I am immensely inspired by.

THIS IS EXCITING EVEN IF IT DOESN'T WORK OUT

OMG I'M MAKING SO MANY TYPOS SHIT I SHOULD SLEEP

I miss high school way more than seems normal.

I wish I had zoology friends at my school. You know, someone I can talk to about my weird animal trivia who won't be bored to tears by it. I haven't met anyone like that at my school.

I went home on Homecoming weekend rather than sticking around. I was a little disappointed because I thought there might have been a dance I missed; but now that I've gotten back, I'm glad I left. I guess all that happened was a lot of partying, and I don't do that.

I have the school part of college down. It's the making-friends not-being-socially-awkward part that I don't get.

I'm running out of bubble wrap and that is very sad.

I'm immensely excited about Halloween this year. I don't even know why. I just love the season- costumes, pumpkins, corn mazes, even haunted houses (although they terrify me to ridiculous amounts). Sadly, I'm pretty sure it's a bad idea to keep a jack-o-lantern in a dorm room, even without the candle; and I've heard college kids don't tend to dress up for Halloween (which is retarded. Who the fuck doesn't like to dress up for Halloween?).

I think I might try not to visit home too often, because coming back to school afterward was awful.

I really don't like my Theatre group. Luckily the rest of the class seems okay, but...

My Creativity class never fails to make me feel better, even if I walk into class feeling like complete shit and just don't want to be there.

I think watching Supernatural Season 4 until one in the morning last night contributed to my general pissiness this morning. Not because I was up too late, but because that show is so depressing at times that it seeps into the rest of my life. I miss when the boys were less angsty.

I stayed up all night- not just late, until 4 or 5, like I've been doing all summer- actually all night. No sleep at all. I was working on the summer reading response essay for my college. Well, that's sort of a white lie; I spent part of the time working on it, the rest of the time being distracted by the idiocy that is Bill O'Reilly.

Sweet Lord, that man should not exist, much less be on television.

There were some great clips on Youtube of him being owned by sixteen-year-old boys and rappers, though, so that was okay.

Now I have to decide whether I want to sleep or wait until later tonight. Sleep sounds tempting, but my sleep schedule is so fucked up already that I don't want to risk it. And if I stay up until midnight with no sleep, maybe I'll be able to reset my circadian rhythms or whatever and get a normal sleeping pattern before college. 

So yeah, I'm leaning toward working on my ~SURPRISE PROJECT~ that I'm too tired to keep much of a secret. It's a webcomic about my best friend/college roommate and me. I have to work on getting our faces right if I'm going to be drawing that much of them.

Bleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh. 


Oh wait, breakfast. Maybe that would be good.