dasheroy_muffins: (pissy sheldon)
So my grandpa's  in the hospital right now, for some issues he's having with his gallbladder. He's doing okay right now, but he's been in there for a week or more and they still don't know what to do. No one's decided for sure if he's staying for surgery, or if they're doing it in a few weeks; if he's going to a rehab center to get his balance back, or if he's going straight home; no one knows anything for sure. One doctor will come in and say he's getting the surgery tomorrow; an hour later the surgeon will arrive just to tell us that the surgery's off. They go back and forth countless times every day, and this has been going on for way too long.

My grandma doesn't like to drive, so my mom's been driving her to and from the hospital every day. She leaves early in the morning, and gets home really late. I haven't really seen her at all this week or last. If my grandpa goes straight home without the rehab, she's probably going to stay over there for a few days. It's taking so much out of her; and we were supposed to go camping at an SCA (society for creative anachronism) event this week. She was looking forward to it for weeks, months, and then it all went down the drain. I wan't too upset about missing it, but she was. And she's so worried and frustrated about my grandpa all the time... And she goes back to work in a few weeks.

My dad's been at work every weekday, like usual. He comes home late, too. And I can't go out without them. It's not that they take both cars; my mom's been taking my grandma's car, so her normal car is just sitting in the garage. But like an idiot, I didn't go out and get my full license when I could have, and no I have no opportunity to get it, or to drive. I'm eighteen, going to college, and I have a learner's permit. It's pathetic. 

So for the last few days, I've been sitting at home alone, doing nothing. I've been so bored that laundry is fun now. It's something to do, at least. I wish I could write or draw to pass the time... but I've still got a writer's block and an artist's block. I guess I just have to wait for the right inspiration, but in the meantime I'm going insane.

I miss school. It made me feel like I was doing something worthwhile. At the very least, it gave me things to do.
dasheroy_muffins: (sam dean mugshots)
 Since I always tend to use this lj for bitchin', I figure I might as well use it for something normal and cheerful this time around.
...Not necessarily interesting,  mind you, but still more cheerful.

rants about supernatural )

anyway...

ranting about Ocarina of Time, FFX and X-2, and Portal )

Now for the actually important part: real life!

I'm heading off to college in mid-September. It's a little surreal, thinking about how this place is soon going to be my parents' house, not mine. This room won't really be mine, exactly. It'll just be a room I stay in every so often, that happens to have a lot of my stuff in it. It used to terrify me; I feel like it still would, if I could make myself stop and think about it. But I'm good at ignoring things. There was a defense mechanism for that, making yourself forget things you don't want to think about... we learned about it in psych. It's not repression... wish I could remember the word.

But anyway, I'm for sure rooming with my best friend Miranda; in the dorm building we wanted, no less. We  start later than almost all of my other friends. We haven't even had orientation yet. It's going to be so weird, knowing all our friends are already away at school but us.

In the meantime, I'm trying to regain all the drawing skills I seem to have lost since the end of the school year. For about the last month of high school, I was too tired and stressed and busy to draw; and now that I've finally started drawing again, it looks like I've regressed to the skill set I had in ninth grade. It's enormously frustrating. I know if I work at it constantly, I can get it back to where it was; but it's hard to keep going when everything you see on the page looks like crap. My writing's suffered even more, since I haven't actually written anything good since- wow, March. And that was Phoenix Wright fanfiction.

Ah, well. At least I have something to work on this year, besides classes. I'm taking a first-year seminar on creativity, an evolutionary bio and genetics class with lab, and an intro theatre class (not that I'm actually any good at acting, but I'd like to be, and that's what 100-level classes are for, right?). I'm actually starting to get excited... and that's a big deal, for me.

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dasheroy_muffins

December 2011

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